Mean-Spirited Wish Fulfillment in the Land of Nod

Hello. For the first time in weeks, someone other than the semi-coherent yet entertaining “El Sway” is posting on this blog. It is I, Ben, and I’d like to tell you the true story of a dream I had several nights ago. This will serve as a window into my frustrated, shriveled-up, perpetually underachieving psyche:

I was visiting my Pennsylvania hometown, and decided to go see a movie at the local theater. I paid for my ticket and went to the concession stand, and was amazed to see that none other than sketch comedy legend Bob Odenkirk was working there. This was depressing to me, as I thought to myself “Man, if Bob Odenkirk can’t make a living in comedy these days, then I am truly fucked.” I ordered a popcorn, but couldn’t bring myself to strike up a conversation.

Just then, a sketch group that will go unnamed walked into the lobby, and started to perform a self-congratulatory bit related to some high-profile shows they have coming up. This was too much for Bob Odenkirk to take. He came out from behind the concession stand, walked over to the sketch group, and proceeded to rip them apart on both a personal and professional level. I know that he called them “douchebags”, and in this case that was the most appropriate word he could have used.

I just sat back and watched, satisfied that Bob had asserted his dominance over these douchebag pretenders to the throne.

So, the lesson of this dream was:

1. Even successful comedians are failures in the world at large

2. The small triumphs of my contemporaries are to be resented.

3. There is satisfaction in seeing others brought down to my level.


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